Humorous Essays Based on students' memories
"All have died
except for those who are alive, and those whom we remember"Confucius
- From the author
- Review of a book by O.P.Syedyshev "The Guys"
- Copyright
The Guys
Essay 1. How I became a student
Essay 2. Mini-dorm
Essay 3. Arkasha
Essay 4. Ditto
Essay 5. Vagram
Essay 6. Eugene
Essay 7. Slava Sizikov
Essay 8. Batya
Essay 9. Tolik and Vagram
Essay 10. Ilgam and Otari
Essay 11. Petya Kozlov and a pipe
Essay 12. Golubev and Sasha Plokhikh
Essay 13. Serezha Sherbinin
Essay 14. Operative surgery exam
Essay 15. Striptease of Leada Syrkasheva
Essay 17. Pseudo wedding
Essay 18. How I was a trade union organi...
Essay 19. Anatomy
Essay 20. #118 Group
Essay 21. RW
Essay 22. Brothers Romashov
Essay 23. Pharmakology
Essay 24. Sambo
Essay 25. Dimka the Wine-Maker
Essay 26. Brewery
Essay 27. Delicacy
Essay 28. Muster
Essay 29. Festival
Essay 30. Cant wait to get married
Essay 31. Beer at lectures
Essay 32. Examinations
Essay 33. The murder will out
Essay 34. An accident
Essay 35. Vendetta
Essay 36. A lesson to remember for a lif...
Essay 38. A wedding ring
Essay 40. How different all of them are
Essay 41. Product #2
Essay 42. A guitar
Essay 43. A stranger in medicine
Essay 44. Oh, sports - You are life!
Essay 45. Canalis nasolacrimalis
Essay 46. Young Communist League (Komsom...
Essay 47. Unus - one out of five
Essay 48. His Majesty photographer
Essay 49. Three tablets of aminazine
Essay 50. "Nothern Lights"
Essay 51. Gentlemen of luck
Essay 52. Brother-2
Essay 53. Three thanks
Essay 54. Superstitious Beliefs
Essay 56. Satanic Grin
Essay 57. 21 Gurgles
Essay 58. Triplets
Essay 59. Pilau on Issyk Kul
Essay 60. Is speculation business or not...
Essay 61. Bitter Sugar
Essay 63. Cream Of Wheat
Essay 64. Feeling Of Pride
Essay 65. Was It Love?
Essay 67. Examination Paper #13
Essay 68. The Devil of Adventurism
Essay 69. Sketching Characters
Essay 70. An Excursion
Essay 71. Winter examinations
Essay 72. Stierlitz is no match for them...
Essay 73. Inhale through your mouth, ple...
Essay 74. Hitler kaputt!
Essay 75. A second-year student
Essay 76. Mistakes should be paid for!
Essay 77. Four letters
Essay 78. Prince of Imereti
Essay 79. There are too few workers and ...
Essay 80. A pood of salt
Essay 81. A Prankster
Essay 82. Let's Man The Barricades!
Essay 83. Now A Kiss!
Essay 84. Briefs
Essay 85. A Miracle!
Essay 86. A mouse!.. in a hairdo? How ve...
Essay 87. A Born Obstetrician
Essay 88. International Children's Day
Essay 91. Here is the one for you, fasci...
Essay 94. A sight for sore eyes
Essay 96. REAR
Essay 97. And you are a gambler, Paramos...
Essay 98. An Ode to Pilav
Essay 99. Always hungry
Essay 100. Dudes
Essay 114. The night before
Essay 119. An autograph
Essay 130. Déjà vu
Essay 137. Twelve
Essay 141. A password is needed
Essay 142. Home brew
Essay 143. Mind what you say
Essay 144. Experimenters
Essay 145. An autograph
Essay 146. Hydrocele
Essay 147. Clip on the back of the head
Essay 148. Al Qasr
Essay 149. We were optimists...
Essay 150. Despotic and wilful person
Essay 151. With a sickle at the balls
Essay 152. Liquidation
Essay 153. Resonance
Essay 154. Shock therapy
Essay 155. Good luck of Victor Kiss
Essay 156. Herd instinct
Essay 157. Cond'omer
Essay 159. The Gypsy Baron
Essay 160. SI system
Essay 161. Foie gras
Essay 162. Divine disposition
Essay 163. Chizhik-Pyzhik*
Essay 164. Culinary terrorist act
Essay 172. At the world's end
Essay 173. Rupture
After graduation
Essay 37 Whyte chrysanthemums
Essay 55 We Are the Eleventh! So What?
Essay 62 Feinzilberg's Mistake
Essay 90 Betwixt and Between...
Essay 92 Those who are drowning are to ...
Essay 93 People, be happy
Essay 116 Here's a fine how d'ye do!
Essay 131 Feminine logic
Essay 132 Bimbo and, pardon, balls
Essay 133 Forty years later
Essay 134 Product #2 again
Essay 136 Striptease of Fomitch
Essay 138 Love and gastric ulcer
Essay 139 A victim of essays
Essay 140 Sleep!
Essay 158 Help-it's a panic
Essay 165 A Hen
Essay 166 The first vacation
Essay 167 Tails
Essay 168 PEA
Essay 169 Sochi
Essay 170 VOLGA
Essay 171 Muriuk
Essay 174 Bear's disease
Essay 175 An escape
Kitchen talks
Essay 39. A brick on the top of the head
Essay 89. Guriev Porridge (or conversati...
Essay 113. Prosperity of Russia
Essay 135. A Prescription
Beyond the Horizon
Essay 16. Its a small world
Essay 66. Paris, Paris...
Essay 95. Milan is a Lucrative City
Essay 102. A Look and Something
Essay 103. Tango 'Magnolia'
Essay 110. Buddha is smiling
Essay 128. Red Light District
Essay 150. Despotic and willful person
Despotic and willful person is a person who acts by its whim and self-will, humiliating dignity of others (from Wikipedia)Former students, when they become imposing and pompous after graduating from their institutes, forget various situations they had had in those happy, and nevertheless, not careless years. However when they are in a certain situation, for instance in a company of their fellow students, then it starts: “And you remember how…” or “Do you remember that…”. So Victor Kiss found himself in the situation when memories came flooding back after he had read my Humorous Essays. His memories were so bright and vivid that he could not resist immediately writing about them to me. And he had a lot to remember. You will laugh, but again the main character of the reminiscences about the second year at the institute is a great figure on a scale of the Kemerovo medical institute of those days. I wrote more than once about that distinguished and ambiguous person, who combined rough manners to students with thorough knowledge of his subject and incredible love of it.
Associate professor Ryzhkov T.F.
Of course, this is Timofey Fadeievitch Ryzhkov or “Faradeiy” in student everyday life. He was loved and hated. He invoked those feelings, because he was a genius of anatomy, but an incredibly despotic and willful person. So Vitya happened to be among those who were re-taking the tests they had failed; the guys were nice in everyday life, but poor students in anatomy. Please, do not judge Vitya and the other too strictly, because to be a poor student was not very unusual or something special with Faradey. That time Vitya did not pass the only test he had failed on, even though he thought that he had prepared one hundred per cent for it. He simply even did not have a chance to answer. It happened so that Faradey chose Volodya Kravtchenko to be the first victim. So to speak about Volodya, he was a strongly built handsome guy; he was a couple of years older than the rest in his group. Volodya was doing his best, but received bad grades on a regular basis, and he had seven of them from Faradey. To make up for the test Volodya came looking like a real dandy, but the main thing was that he had learned everything, at least that was what he thought.
When he started answering everybody grew numb with astonishment. Volodya was giving a detailed answer with using specimen for illustration; he successfully answered five of Faradey’s questions in a row, if not to exaggerate!!!, so the latter one had nothing to do, but circle five out of his seven bad marks. That was a record. Nobody had managed to answer so many questions of Faradey during one class before. However Volodya started rejoicing and dreaming of his future without failed tests at least in anatomy too early. Yes, it was too early. On the sixth question Volodya got really confused. It was as if his mind went blank, he could not even remember the Latin name of a rib. That happens. And there was Faradey’s trademark yell.
Sorry that was not a yell, but a roar “Those like you do not belong to the medical institute… You should be sent to the Army!!!” And there Volodya quite calmly went: “But I served in the Army, I am a reserve senior lieutenant…” Hair started moving in Faradey’s nostrils, and there came the roar again: “To the mine!!!...”. And Volodya replied: “And before joining the military forces I had worked in the mine…”. Yeah, that was some situation! The next was not a roar, but a howl: “You should be a yard cleaner…” What’d bitten Volodya, he himself could not understand afterwards; but he gave an answer to that question as well: “I work part time as a yard cleaner now at Sevastopolskaya…”. There was dead silence in the class room, Faradey breathed in, but could not breathe out. Everybody was in panic, what would happen next? And there, how fortunate, was the end of the class.
9 April, 2012
© Copyright: Oleg Syedyshev, 2012
Publishing licence #214040200777
Translated by Viktoria Potykinato content ↑